Archives for posts with tag: acceptance

“Comfort Activity”

February 20, 2014 //

Image courtesy of yingyo/ FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Sometimes I think I’ve never grown up—-that I can get lost in the land of play and stay for hours. Sometimes that is exactly what my soul needs to rejuvenate itself. Last night I downloaded a free game on my KindleHD, and I played it for about thirty minutes. It “sucked the juice” out of my Kindle, and I had to stop playing and recharge “my toy.” While it was charging I got on my laptop and purchased the PC version of the game —–then I stayed up until almost 1:00 AM playing the new game. When I went to bed I immediately fell asleep, but one of the images I remember seeing right before I woke up this morning was an image of the new game’s screen.

So, am I caught in yet another addiction? If so, as long as it does no harm, I am not going to worry about it. If it becomes all I do, if I stop loving and feeding my dogs, if I stop eating, exercising, drinking fluids, etc. so I can continue playing “the game” then I am in trouble! If my game playing starts to interfere with my functioning then I am approaching the land of “disorder” as it is defined by those who work in mental health.

I must admit, though, that my childhood games were healthier for me. They involved no electricity, and they taught my mind to be creative and introduced me to the land of imagination. I did not have any other children to play with on my isolated farm, but that didn’t stop the fun. There were trees, moss, baby birds, frogs, terrapins (Latin and “hillbilly” for land turtle), fireflies, and June Bugs to play with, and the games got my body moving and exercising right along with my brain. If I encountered a snake, wasp, spider, or scorpion I knew to keep as far away as possible. It was another day and time, and children could play freely without fearing abduction or worse.

I need to go back to analyzing what is happening when I get deeply engrossed in playing an electronic game. One of the ways I cope with anxiety or stress is to engage in “comfort activity.” In the past that has been drinking alcohol and compulsively eating. Both of these activities are turned over to my Higher Power now on a daily basis, so I think the allure of last night’s game was a direct response to my not so healthy co-dependency needs to control and fix other people. Yesterday I wrote about a friend’s terminal addiction to alcohol, and I think my deep excursion into electronic game playing last night was a means of escaping into a “comfort activity” so I would stop worrying about something I cannot fix.

Praying helps me a lot with accepting and living with things I cannot change, but once in a while, escape into something that totally occupies my mind and gives me a “time-out” from obsessive thinking about whatever is bothering me is extremely helpful. The “recovery guru” who sits in my head and facilitates the “healthier committee meetings” that take place therein has not failed, however, to remind me to be careful that whatever escape I find does not become just another addictive crutch.

Enough. I know severe thunderstorms and possible tornadoes are forecast for our region today, so I wish all my readers who live nearby a safe and hopefully uneventful day. Come to think of it, that is not a bad wish for everyone! May God bless and keep you.

Tags acceptance, addictive behavior, prayer

Categories recovery, Spirituality

Why?

February 11, 2014 //

Image courtesy of patrisyu/ FreeDigitalPhotos.net

A Face Book status posted by Bishop Charleston yesterday morning got me thinking about the simple, or not so simple, act of asking “why”—–something I do often, and not always with good intentions. As a small child I was reprimanded and punished for asking why, but it is something I continuously do even today decades later. Because of Bishop Charleston’s words I am more certain than ever that I should have instead been encouraged to ask “why.”

Here is an excerpt from what Bishop Charleston had to say: “….our God invites us ever forward, following the endless path of why….Our faith, therefore, is not a law but a lab, a place of inquiry, a process by which we come to learn, and in the learning, love.”

Accessed 2/10/14 at: https://www.facebook.com/bishop.charleston

Reading these words freed my spirit to soar to the heavens…..vindicated, validated, and “right with my God.” Then I had to stop and think. What a relief it would be to have all my decades of “why” questions justified! However,but in good conscience, I am not convinced my motives in asking why served to promote learning and love. What I replied to the Bishop’s post was: ” I must confess I have a tendency at times to let this bothersome question of ‘why’ keep me distanced from God. At those times I think there is a degree of anger and resistance influencing my questions. With that type of ‘why’ question I am not open to learn and to grow in love. I am learning to temper my inquiring spirit with acceptance, faith, and trust. And, of course, I am still asking ‘why’ and gratefully learning and allowing love to grow.”

What did I mean by all those words? Sometimes asking why is my way of rebelling and saying “no….it is my way or no way” or “why didn’t things turn out the way I wanted them to?” Sometimes it is a criticism meaning “that’s not the way I would have done it.” If you look closely, you can see the common denominator in all those “non-productive why questions” is “I”——my ego, my false self, or my self-will run riot, depending on which school of thought you use to categorize negative actions that are grounded in “self.” Twelve step recovery teaches that one needs to surrender this type of self-centeredness for God/Higher Power centeredness in order to enter recovery and survive life’s challenges. As children of God we need a sense of identity, but we do not need to play God.

When I can ask “why” from an honest, non-critical place of wanting to understand, to learn, and to grow, then “why” is an excellent question to ask. It is one I will continue to ask. However, I will also continue to analyze my motives in asking the question. In doing so, I may find that I need to surrender my will to God and accept life on life’s terms. When I am able to do that it is amazing how much simpler my life can be and how much my spiritual horizons expand—–and how many answers to “why?” I discover. May God bless and keep you.

Tags acceptance, expectations, God, self-will, surrender

Categories recovery, Spirituality

Evolving Elder

February 8, 2014 //

Photograph by K. Farwell

I got to try out my cleats this afternoon in a parking lot that was one solid sheet of ice…and, they worked! I took them off to go into the store, and stopped to replace them once I was outside and ready to work my way across the parking lot back to my car after I was through shopping. As I was replacing them, a man called out from the driver’s seat of his idling pickup, “Now that’s what I call a good idea!” I replied, “Yes, especially for clumsy folks like me….these are kind of like snow tires for ‘old ladies.'”

The surprise contained in that last paragraph is the way I implied I was an old lady; the phrase rolled off my lips without a moment’s hesitation. Back in the day, any man that introduced me as his “old lady” was in for a stern reprimand from me. I did not consider myself “old,” and I was certain I did not belong to another human being. I had an even stronger negative reaction to being called “chick.”

Now that I’ll be 65 next week, I have had to accept that I am joining the “officially old” population in just a few days. I am viewing being “old” differently now; probably out of necessity. Now it is almost like an honor to have reached recognizable “elder hood.” Ah, in that term, lies the essence of my new found comfort. To me, being an elder means being a respected citizen venerated as a source of wisdom gained from having lived a full life. Turning 65 represents hitting a milestone—a time to celebrate all that I enjoyed and survived along the way. My comfort level with being an elder is based on the insight that real wisdom lies in my willingness to continue to evolve, learn, love and grow. Nothing has to stop—-except those things I have always needed to stop.

So, in a few days I will officially consider myself an elder. Yes, there will be “older moments”—-the kind I still don’t enjoy; most of those are an effect of physical aging. My human body is wearing out one day at a time. This thought makes me chuckle because I realize my body has been doing that one day at a time for my entire life. I am sure that even as a toddler and small child I had cells in my body that were wearing out and being replaced by new cells. This aging process is different though. It is not just about losing cells, it is about losing abilities, or at least partially doing so—-abilities that I have taken for granted up until now. I gratefully realize, however, that I have come out on the “winning side” of the bargain; I have gained so much more than I could ever possibly lose in this experience called life. So what if I don’t move as fast or as gracefully as I once did? So what if I have periodic bouts of pain? My “lifetime of experience” has certainly been worth the price. I even welcome the wrinkles that are becoming more pronounced on my face; to me they are mapping out the emotions I have experienced during my life time, and I am happy most of my wrinkles are “smile wrinkles.”

Enough. I had no idea I’d end up writing today about my thoughts as I approach the age of 65. No telling where my mind will wander when I let it! Thanks for wandering with me. God bless and keep you.

Tags acceptance, aging, elder, evolving

Categories Spirituality, Uncategorized

Trust God and Carry On

February 7, 2014 //

Image courtesy of Stuart Mile/ FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Again, here I sit typing at the keyboard. Spoiler alert: today I am going to be talking health issues in some detail, so you might want to skip to the last paragraph if you want to “cut to the chase” and read my spiritual slant on all this.

I called me doctor yesterday. It was a form of surrender. I gave up. I have been doing everything I can to control my blood sugar levels by diet alone. Up until now I have been very successful—-mostly, I think, due to God’s grace. I went off of my oral diabetic medication over three years ago and have not had to go back on it because God showed me a way to eat that is healthy for me. I am glad I called and asked for help because my fasting blood sugar when I woke up this morning was 67.

Thirty some odd years ago, long before I became a Type 2 diabetic, I was diagnosed as hypoglycemic. At that time my low blood sugars were mostly due to forgetting to eat at set times (in rebellion) or eating the wrong things. My self-will run riot in regards to controlling my own food agenda continued, and, consequently, I became a Type 2 diabetic about fifteen years later. When my blood sugar is low (hypoglycemia) I get a bad headache, I feel irritable, nothing seems to “go right,” and I have trouble thinking clearly. It is a bit like being a little bit drunk or, perhaps even more so, experiencing a hangover.

I should not be surprised that my body chemistry is changing as I age, but I am not enjoying it. I am no longer predictable. Yesterday I realized that I was once again trying to “control” my food and health even though I have asked for God’s help. That is when I surrendered, because I am thoroughly confused at this point. Fruit and protein are supposed to keep your blood sugar level as is eating five small meals during the day about 3-4 hours apart. Complex carbohydrates (whole grains) help some people, but they are bad news for me, so I avoid eating them or anything with flour or sugar in it. I know I need to add fruit and/or protein to my diet, but at this time I am unsure how to do it.

My doctor’s office just called me back right before I began writing this blog. My doctor’s advice was to add fruit juice, fruit, or protein. She suggested yogurt. I told the nurse I eat Greek yogurt and fruit at once or twice a day, so I would not be adding them to my diet unless I added additional amounts. Here’s what we finally decided for me to try first: a mid-morning small fruit or protein serving and adding additional fruit to my lunch. Since I asked God this morning for knowledge of his will for me and the power to carry that out, I will follow my doctor’s advice and see what happens.

Now that I’ve bored you with all that tedious detail, I’ll try to tell you what spiritual message I see in all this. First, I need to trust God—even if that means asking for and following advice from others. Second, I need to act accordingly. This is where faith comes in because in the past when I’ve added the recommended foods I stopped losing weight and even started gaining weight at times. The spiritual message I am getting from all this is sometimes you just have to trust God and carry on—-so, “Trust God and Carry On” will be my motto for today. Take care, and God bless and keep you.

Tags acceptance, God, trust

Categories Spirituality

Rise and Shine

February 5, 2014 //

Image courtesy of amenic181/ FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Well, here I sit again in self-imposed isolation listening to the noise of the snow plow break apart the stillness that envelops the neighborhood. The school across the street is quiet and empty. My dogs have no children to bark at as they pass by our yard. Yesterday’s frozen precipitation is, of course, still hanging around and challenging outdoor movement from place to place.

In some ways, the quiet stillness accompanied by the “tick-tock” of the clock on the wall is like being in the presence of an old and comfortable friend. This friend gives me permission to be lazy, to be productive, to be creative—-to be “me” in any way I choose. That brings a smile to my lips—-in typing that last sentence I realized I always have the opportunity to choose how I want to exist in any moment.

Today I choose to wrap myself in God’s love and to make choices that are healthy for me. I have no deadlines, no appointments, no obligations, and no list of things I have to do. I am left with the choice to do what I must to survive my reality—–and that is to turn my will and my life over to the care of God as I understand him. In the beginning of my recovery this turning things over 12 step stuff was just “a phrase often repeated.” Now after all these years and many miracles later this “turning over” comes from my heart, and I enjoy releasing my will and my life to God. Of course, I still have times when I stubbornly hang on to my futile self-centered attempts to control, but even then I find myself begrudgingly handing things over to him.

I have started practicing a new ritual in my life. It is one of my early morning rituals, and it is much more meaningful than making coffee or cooking bacon. I walk to my dining room, face the east, and look at a framed counted-cross stitch my mother did for me. I am looking at the words my mother so painstakingly spelled out: 1 Corinthians 13: 4-7. These special words describe God’s love for me and for everyone. Then I bow and release my “will and life” to God. In return, as I fold my arms in front of my chest, I literally feel God wrapping his arms around me and hugging me. Prayer and personal, private sacred words—-words that affirm and represent the love shared between God and myself—–are very important components of this early morning ritual. This ritual is both comforting and powerful. It puts my day “on track” and keeps my soul and heart open to God. It empowers me to follow God’s will rather than my own throughout the day.

As I sit typing in this quiet stillness, I am not alone. God is by my side; his presence is here. My four dogs are relaxed, warm, and sleeping, and I am happy.

Tags acceptance, God, hugs, Love, prayer, rituals, solitude

Categories love, recovery, Spirituality

Teaching the Teacher

January 17, 2014 //

“If I’m not appreciated, that’s your problem that you don’t appreciate me. Unless I need your love, then it’s my problem. So my needs are what are giving you the power over me. Those people’s power over you to take you out of your equanimity and love and consciousness has to do with your own attachments and clingings of mind. That’s your work on yourself, that’s where you need to meditate more, it’s where you need to reflect more, it’s where you need a deeper philosophical framework, it’s where you need to cultivate the witness more, it’s where you need to work on practicing opening your heart more in circumstances that aren’t optimum. This is your work. ”

accessed 1/17/14 at: http://www.ramdass.org/a-heavy-curriculum/

Well, this quote woke me up this morning! I’ve talked about self-validation vs. co-dependency for years, but that’s become old hat to me, and those words do not offer any thing new my mind and soul can use. Those words are about insight; they are not about action. Ram Dass’ words are about action, or at least that is where they lead my thoughts.

My own needs are what I need to work on—-the thing I need to think about, meditate about, detach and distance myself from by realizing my self worth comes from within and from Creator. If I am doing anything for the purpose of winning praise, recognition, or gratitude from another, then my motives are way off base. What Dass calls my “witness” needs to objectively observe my thoughts and actions so I can begin to be aware of doing this. I cannot change something if I am not aware of it.

Here’s an example from something I was involved in yesterday afternoon that shows me Ram Dass is probably right. I was teaching a crafts class in which three people were learning how to crochet. I had planned to first teach them to read the pattern, then how to do the chain stitch, and, finally, how to do a double stitch—-the only two stitches used to make the scarf that had been selected as a class project. I thought it would take about 10 minutes to teach them to read a pattern, and about 10 minutes of practice for each stitch.

Things didn’t happen the way I expected. There is much more to crocheting than saying, “this is the stitch, this is what it is called, and this is how you do it.” There were a multitude of nuances left out of both the printed instructions that were provided and the verbal and visual instructions I was providing. It seems that I have been crocheting so long that I’d forgotten many of the “little steps” that are part of the “bigger steps.” All of the sudden things were not going like clockwork, and I had a room full of confused and anxious people. Together we started breaking the process down into the “mini-steps” necessary in these two basic stitches. Things started working better, but things were still not going well.

Finally, a voice of reason was heard from across the room saying, “Why don’t we make the scarf with just the one single stitch?” I am so grateful that my friend was there to “witness objectively” what was going on and to make that suggestion. When we did that, the whole room relaxed. Where there had been stress and performance anxiety, there was now more self-acceptance and less tension. Instead of frowns and throwing things down in exasperation, there were smiles and laughter. The class had become “we” instead of being divided into expert and novice. My own thoughts were no longer as focused on feeling like a failure as a teacher. Slowly I let go of my need to be a “good teacher” and became, instead, a empathetic facilitator. My “needs” got out of the way—-and when that happened, people who had never crocheted began to crochet.

The lesson I learned yesterday was whenever I am feeling anxious to try to detach from the emotions I am feeling so I can “witness” what is happening—-then my perception will not be as distorted by my own needs. It sounds simple, but I know it will take lots of work to develop awareness and healthy detachment. I am grateful to have taken this first step of acceptance. May God bless and keep you.

Tags acceptance, character defect, expectations

Categories peace, recovery, Spirituality

Remodeling Myself

January 16, 2014 //

Image courtesy of sattva/ FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Last night at a book study we were talking about what it means to turn our will and our lives over to the care of our Higher Power as AA’s Big Book instructs those who wish to remain in recovery to do. The group seemed to unanimously agree that it did not mean you turn everything over to God and then just sit there waiting for him to do everything. After all, we are humans who were given the gift of choice by God, and, consequently, that makes us accountable for our choices, actions, and the subsequent consequences that occur. As a group, we agreed that when we let God’s spirit empower us we still have to do the footwork.

There are always, at least for me, a committee of rebellious “naysayers” having a debate in my head during conversations like this. One is saying, “Yeah, right. If I give up my life and my will nothing will be left.” Another is saying, “I gave up alcohol, cigarettes, compulsive eating,……why is it always about giving something up?” Another is saying, “Yippee! Go for it! Let God run things, then you can do anything you want because it will really be God doing it—-anything you do will be God’s will.”

I could go on, but listening to my mind’s “committee meetings” can be tedious at best. Instead, I would like to try to answer my committee. I realize I will be defending my beliefs, much as I had to when I defended my doctoral dissertation to my dissertation committee when I was in graduate school. First, every time I have given something up, my God has given me much, much more in return. Relief, serenity, peace of mind—–all of these are inherent in realizing I no longer have to control everything and that it is unrealistic for me to expect to be able to do so. What has been left for me at those times when I have voluntarily turned something over to my Higher Power is a strong faith that provides fertile ground for the growth of my emerging, evolving spirit. When I continue to let God be in control things go well—-or at least I am, with God’s help, able to handle whatever comes my way. However, when I “take back” whatever I’ve turned over to God, things start building up into problems yet again. And again. Someday I hope to leave things in God’s hands permanently, and I am encouraged by the fact that I can now go for longer and longer periods without rebelling against the way “God is driving the bus.”

This brings me to the second question, why is it always about giving something up? For me, the answer is because I have spent a life time building an identity/ego that defines, in my mind, who I am. My inclination is to hold onto that identity tenaciously, no matter what. So naturally, I am reluctant to let go of anything that I feel is necessary to “stay who I am.” Again, in my case, many of the “blocks” I have used to build my identity are faulty. These faulty “blocks” cause continual problems for me, yet I hang on to them because I think I will not be me without them. For the sake of brevity, I have found that I have to let go of these faulty blocks gradually over time, and sometimes I have to do so more than once. For me, it is about “giving something up” because I need to do so to not only survive but to build a better life. The good news is, I really like the new “me” who is evolving because this new identity realizes it is not all about me—-that it is about God’s love and sharing it.

And to the last committee member that thinks turning things over to God offers an invitation to “party hardy” I have to say, “In all due respect, Mr. Committee Party Man, you are a remnant of my ‘stinking thinking’ that got me into most of my life’s messes in the first place. I am still accountable for how I do the footwork and carry out God’s will—-and if I start practicing my old bad habits yet again, it only means I have purposively divorced myself from God’s guidance and help.” Perhaps this response is a bit harsh, but this is the point where I need to be hard on myself. I seem to think I can turn things over to God and take back bits and pieces of what I’ve turned over because “I’m better, I’ve changed, things are different now, and now I can handle it.” This is the type of thinking that always brings me back to being enmeshed in self-created problems.

Wow! I did not mean to write for so long this morning. If you have stayed with me and plowed through all this, I thank you. May God bless and keep you.

Tags acceptance, addictive behavior, character defect, expectations, God, self-will, surrender

Categories recovery, Spirituality

Seizing the Moment

January 15, 2014 //

Image courtesy of coward_lion/ FreeDigitalPhotos.net

I had an interesting experience this morning. I had my annual mammogram; I always expect the painful squeezing to be the hardest part of this annual experience. However, this morning my problem was breathing. The person operating the machinery would tell me with no advanced warning to ” stand still, don’t breathe.” Then I would have to hold my breath for what seemed like a long time before I was told to “breathe, stand still, and don’t breathe” in quick succession. This hardly gave me time to take a deep breath in to fuel my body’s oxygen needs between the two long “don’t breathe” episodes. This procedure was repeated five or six times before my “ordeal” was finished. I remember holding my breath, holding and trying to concentrate on God within, on a painting on the wall, on a pleasant memory—-on anything but my clamoring need to breathe.

With those efforts came the realization that since I had turned my life and my will over to God this morning, God was in charge and handling things. I had to remind myself God had created my body, and “pre-programmed automatic breathing” would take over before I became unconscious. Thinking about God’s place in my life, in my quiet core within and in all of creation, helped me tolerate those close to panic filled moments . Once I was able to breathe I released prayers of gratitude that I was not suffering from asthma, bronchitis, or any other respiratory ailment as so many do——otherwise I would have been medically compromised during this procedure.

Once again a rather mundane and “ordinary” situation reinforced, for me, one of the hardest lessons I have had to learn, and one that I keep needing to re-learn or refresh on a regular basis. Basically, I have to voluntarily trust God, my creator to help me handle whatever happens be it “ordinary” or “emergent.” Whatever happens to me, I am not facing it alone. In my act of seeking and accepting Gods love by turning my will and my life over to him I am acknowledging and allowing Spirit to be my co-pilot for absolutely everything. I have also learned to ask myself, whatever the situation is, what God wanted me to learn from that situation. The result has been, for me, very conducive to my own spiritual growth. May God bless and keep you.

Tags acceptance, breathing, Creator, God

Categories Spirituality

Life Prescription

January 14, 2014 //

Image courtesy of voraorn/ FreeDigitalPhotos.net

A frequently occurring mantra in my head this morning is, “Take a deep breath, relax. This too shall pass.” I am in one of those moods where every little thing is irritating me. Actually, I am allowing it to do so. I have to consciously redirect my thoughts to what really matters—– that God is in control. Period. It does not matter that my television carrier stopped carrying the Weather Channel overnight. It does not matter that the university’s web-page generating program is tedious, onerous, and just about every other “bad adjective” I can think to attach to it. It doesn’t matter that I made a trip to the pharmacy last night for a medication that was promised to be phoned in and ready to be picked up by 6 PM last night yet was not there when I arrived to purchase it.

Now, looking at that list of grievances, I realize the things I have allowed to bother me are trivial. The bible verses I chose to post on my church’s Facebook page this morning for the daily bible reading say it all: “It was you who opened up springs and streams; you dried up the ever flowing rivers. The day is yours, and yours also the night; you established the sun and moon” (PSALM 74: 15– 16 NIV). I need to just relax and trust God. Just because things are not going my way does not mean God has abandoned me or anyone else or thing he created. Just because things don’t happen how or when I want them to doesn’t mean God is not in control—–or that he should have done things my way instead of his. Sometimes my psyche is like that of a demanding 2 year old. I don’t like that part of myself. Luckily, God loves all of me regardless of whether I am demanding or in a good mood or not.

Prior to working a twelve step program I would have used this “free floating irritability” triggered by my inability to control everything in my life exactly the way I want to as an excuse to indulge in one or several addictions. Now I know better. I don’t reach for a drink, drug, or sugar. I love myself too much to use my irritation as an excuse to hurt myself. Now I am forced to feel what I am feeling instead of numbing my feelings. I am learning to be that “witness” contemplative prayer is teaching me to be—–to practice a type of detachment so that I can observe what happens and my reaction without getting caught up in the drama of it. I can say to myself, “Well, you’re upset because you didn’t get the medication you need when you need it. Live with it. Going without it a bit longer will not kill you. Get over yourself.”

And, today, that is my best advice to myself—“get over yourself!” It is not all about me or how I think or need things to be. What I can change is how I react to life. Sometimes it is about accepting my reaction, noting it, and getting on with the business of living, and, if I am lucky, I can even begin to realize that living is a gift and not a business at all. God bless and keep you.

Tags acceptance, feelings, irritation

Categories Contemplative Prayer, recovery, Spirituality, Uncategorized

Trusting God’s Agenda

January 7, 2014 //

Image courtesy of Stuart Miles/ FreeDigitalPhotos.net

I seem to be fixated on the concept of happiness and what different sources suggest makes being happy possible. Today, from two different sources, I read about how expectations can lead to frustration (accessed 1/7/14 @ http://www.ramdass.org/when-emotion-overtakes-you/) and that if we are ever going to be able to be truly happy we will need to learn to tolerate not being in control and unable to predict outcomes (accessed 1/7/14 at: http://tinybuddha.com/blog/accepting-uncertainty-can-happy-without-answers/). To me, that sounds very similar to the phrase I hear so often around recovery tables, i.e., “accepting life on life’s terms.”

I am fortunate in that my life experiences have forced me over and over again to realize I cannot control or predict anything. AA’s “Big Book” says all I really need pray for is knowledge of God’s will and the power to carry it out. That philosophy makes it very clear that I am never in control and that God is. It is surprising how comfortable and serene I feel when I am able to actually follow this advice. It is not that this prayer automatically solves all my problems. To the contrary, it works because I trust God’s grace and wisdom to influence any situation in such a way that it is “right sized” and open to God’s intervention. Given the limitations of my human understanding and vision, I may not be able to ascertain whether evolving solutions and outcomes are or will be positive. Again, I have to trust my Higher Power’s wisdom which is infinite and can accurately comprehend the “big picture” in a reality not limited by time, space, or intellect.

Please don’t get the idea that I sit around doing nothing just waiting for God’s will to unfold. I actually have to become a conduit for his divine energy and wisdom. I become his tool. This means I need to remain open to doing his work and actively involved in doing it. I often tell those I work with that myself, my attitude, and my actions are the “light switch” that allows God’s will to manifest in this reality. I have to do the work of turning the light switch on so God’s energy, wisdom, grace, and love can be released.

Well, now you have my philosophy regarding what actually creates and maintains “happiness.” Basically, I think it comes down to my attitude. If I don’t get de-railed into self-centered thoughts, actions, and anxieties by consciously or unconsciously trying to take control back from my Higher Power I’ll stay happy. If I don’t question his way of doing things I will be happy. If I don’t question his agenda I will be happy. Succinctly put, if I trust God I will be more than happy. I will be grateful, and, hopefully, I will be sharing these personal positive outcomes with others. May God bless and keep you.

Tags acceptance, God, happy, prayer, trust

Categories recovery, Spirituality