Image courtesy of  Stuart Miles/

I seem to be fixated on the concept of happiness and what different sources suggest makes being happy possible. Today, from two different sources, I read about how expectations can lead to frustration (accessed 1/7/14 @ and that if we are ever going to be able to be truly happy we will need to learn to tolerate not being in control and unable to predict outcomes (accessed 1/7/14 at: To me, that sounds very similar to the phrase I hear so often around recovery tables, i.e., “accepting life on life’s terms.”

I am fortunate in that my life experiences have forced me over and over again to realize I cannot control or predict anything. AA’s “Big Book” says all I really need pray for is knowledge of God’s will and the power to carry it out. That philosophy makes it very clear that I am never in control and that God is. It is surprising how comfortable and serene I feel when I am able to actually follow this advice. It is not that this prayer automatically solves all my problems. To the contrary, it works because I trust God’s grace and wisdom to influence any situation in such a way that it is “right sized” and open to God’s intervention. Given the limitations of my human understanding and vision, I may not be able to ascertain whether evolving solutions and outcomes are or will be  positive. Again, I have to trust my Higher Power’s wisdom which is infinite and can accurately comprehend the “big picture” in a reality not limited by time, space, or intellect.

Please don’t get the idea that I sit around doing nothing just waiting for God’s will to unfold. I actually have to become a conduit for his divine energy and wisdom. I become his tool. This means I need to remain open to doing his work and actively involved in doing it. I often tell those I work with that myself, my attitude, and my actions are the “light switch” that allows God’s will to manifest in this reality. I have to do the work of turning the light switch on so God’s energy, wisdom, grace, and love can be released.

Well, now you have my philosophy regarding what actually creates and maintains “happiness.” Basically, I think it comes down to my attitude. If I don’t get de-railed into self-centered thoughts, actions, and anxieties by consciously or unconsciously trying to take control back from my Higher Power I’ll stay happy. If I don’t question his way of doing things I will be happy. If I don’t question his agenda I will be happy. Succinctly put, if I trust God I will be more than happy. I will be grateful, and, hopefully, I will be sharing these personal positive outcomes with others. May God bless and keep you.